Freedom

Sixteen years ago, I made a decision ... a direct result of a previous decision.  I was young and a conqueror - willing to face life head on.  I'm an honest person, so I went about things in an honest manner.  It didn't take long for me to feel like regretting that, but I'm headstrong too, so...though I wished the nightmare would go away and never come back, it kept recurring and over the years, I have referred to it as a monster.  It has been a very emotionally draining ordeal, and the only reason I face it is because there is no way out...plain and simple.

Last year, when I was at my wits end, God literally chased me down with an unexpected blessing.  I'm not kidding either.  From another ordeal that I was bumped into - totally against my will, God blessed me and worked out what the enemy had meant to harm me for my good and followed it all the way through.  I can honestly say that I had nothing to do with it - it was ALL Him! 

That blessing saved our family in a big way.  I testified of God's amazing goodness and faithfulness to the two people who had prayed me through the ordeal...but was pretty quiet about it other than that for reasons that I must still leave unsaid.  One day...  Today, a whole year later, I found that the blessing was protected - there were no strings attached to be taken care of later.  It was free and clear.  GLORY to GOD!!!

That in itself was enough to shout about!  But, it gets better.  The monster...that yes, I have been dreading facing again...the monster has no real power.  I am a daughter of the KING and stand in Him.  It is good to be truly blessed and highly favored.  I wonder why...but, actually I know why...I was dreading this so.  It is because old mindsets were in place.  Even after my Savior King made a way and changed everything, I was still expecting the old.  Even though I know that Jesus is my everything, I do not have my trust in Him 100% in every area.  If I did, I would have no worries and I would be happy - all of the time!  I've come a long way baby, but still have a ways to go!!  I thank God for being so loving and patient.

Today, even as I rejoiced in the freedom of being free and clear, which is totally enough...I spoke words that reeked of the old mindset.  I quickly repented and cast them down, rendering them ineffective in Jesus' name, asking my Father to supernaturally intervene - I would much rather live according to His way than the world's way, that's for sure!  No matter what, the freedom is enough!  It is sufficient.  It feels good...so good.

So, why would offense rear it's ugly head?  Just to make me choose - we always have a choice to make!  Forgiveness won. 

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On a different note...what a blessing it was to experience God's presence in worship two times today.  He inhabits the praises of His people - and praise Him we did.  : )  No heaviness tonight - only FREEDOM!

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

2 Corinthians 3:17-18